Wednesday, September 15, 2004

Only Half of Me

I always feel disconnected when my fiancee goes back to New Mexico. It is wonderful when he comes home. I can be near him, smell him, hear him and talk to him face to face. But, when he leaves, it is always the same. It never gets easier. It is always difficult. I have figured out it is because I am left with only half of who I am.
He completes who I am...he is truly my soulmate and my other half. Without him at home, I walk around with half of a brain, heart and soul. While going through a story about us in class this evening, this reality hit me. It doesn't take a genius to know this, but I'm slow sometimes.
As I sat in class, listening to people critique my piece, I could only think of him, my love. I wanted him there. I wanted him to take me in his arms and tell me that everything would be alright. That he would be home sooner than I thought. I wanted him to hold my hand. I was missing him so very much. When asked questions that required an answer that involved him...I instantly glowed. Just the thought of him makes me smile, but then it turns me to an emotional wreck.
We put together our engagement announcements today. It was such a great feeling. Our wedding will be here before we know it. But, it is so nice that we have a year and three months or so to cherish it. We can taste every bit along the way and really hold this experience close to our hearts. I wouldn't want it any other way.
For him...honey, I love you more than I can ever tell you. You have brought joy and light into my life. Happy eighth anniversary! I am so glad we got to spend today together. And, thank you for the wonderful weekend. I look forward to so many more memorable weekends with so many we have already shared. We are magic together. We are truly blessed. Thank you for being you.

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