Wonderful Weekend

After a pretty hard week, this weekend was wonderful and exactly what I needed. I took Friday off and used the day to prep for a dinner party we were having on Saturday - IKEA, Target, Jo-Ann's, and Party City. Rachel arrived in town around lunch time and we took it easy until we had to leave for Tucson to see Pink Martini at the Rialto Theatre. What an amazing show! They were just so fantastic...a lot of shimmy-shimmy in our seats. And, the Rialto is a beautiful theatre. I won't go into too many details on our KISS-rocking on the way down to Tucson and our experience of eating dinner on a bench outside of a restaurant. Just know that, as usual, Rachel and I had some quirky fun.

Saturday, we spent the day getting the house and food ready for our dinner party. We were hosting 13 of our closest friends (people who in reality were more like family). Highlights of the food: ricotta cheesecake styled by Miss Rachel, rosemary roasted almonds and homemade tomato sauce, courtesy of a recipe from Mario Batali. Before the party, Ry (yes, he was home on a Saturday -- a wonderful treat), Rachel and I went to Costco to get a few things (including delicious goat cheese with figs) and take a break over a super-cheap lunch.

Dinner was so great! We ate outside at our lovely decorated table, sharing laughs and stories. I really enjoyed seeing all of the smiling faces around the table. People I loved and cared about were all in one place. I felt blessed. The party was a hit. Most everyone left by 12 a.m., but a few of us played Guitar Hero until 2 a.m. Oh, what fun! I didn't even realize how late it was; I was enjoying myself too much.

A testament to the kind friends we have...everyone brought a gift for us. Our home looks like a florists at the moment with the flowers that were given to us -- calla lily, orchid, bouquet of sunflowers. Add chocolate bars and a beautiful-smelling salt scrub to the list of gifts and I almost don't feel worthy of the generosity. The love everyone brought to the house was enough of a gift for me. I am a lucky girl.

So today has been a wind-down, preparing for the realities of work and the grind of the weekday. Before Rachel left to drive back to Cali, we had dim sum. I can never have enough chinese broccoli with oyster sauce. Delish! After Rachel headed out on the road, I realxed a bit and read a book...which turned into a nap. Ahh! The rest of the afternoon was filled with football, a bit of work and then some TV.

What a weekend! Does tomorrow have to be Monday?

Weight Loss Challenge Update: 7 pounds lost so far

Creative Juices

Creative juices is so kitschy, but it is the best way to describe what has been going on so far this weekend. Creativity has been bounding and hopping all over the place and I love it. I haven't been in this place for a while.

Yesterday, I spent the morning playing guitar and creating musically. Then, last night, I visited with a few friends for drinks and conversation. I ended up walking around First Friday, talking to artists. It really inspired to be more bold and courageous with my art. I shouldn't be holding it back and hiding it. Going to work on being more out there with my painting and photography.

Today, I met with another friend to talk writing. We are both working on novels so we are going to meet monthly with additions to our manuscripts, discussing ways to improve and direction. This was our first meeting and it was wonderful! I have been quite motivated to add to what I have so far. It was so nice to hear that my writing inspired him -- my writing! I have been writing off and on all afternoon, with a few cleaning and guitar-playing breaks. With the dark cloudy sky outside, it has been perfect for creating.

On an indirect note of creative juices...yesterday, I decided to get my hair cut. It hadn't been cut for about four months and I thought it was time for a trim. The hairstylist (whom I'd never had cut my hair before -- I walked into the salon near the house) had trimmed my hair and returned my long layers. My hair was about as exciting as it always is -- long hair has the tendency to just "be there." We started talking and I told her I wanted something different -- something edgier (I am having a lot of rock n roll moments lately).

"What do you suggest? I'm feeling adventurous."

"Well, we can make it edgier, but the back will be shorter than it is now."

She explained her idea for my hair and asked me what I thought.

"Let's do it!"

I now have an edgy hair cut that has been helping to feed my creativity. It is a bob with a bit of angle added to it. When she ironed out my hair yesterday with my new cut, I felt like I was channeling Joan Jett just a bit (cool). Today, with the humidity and the resulting curls, I think I have more of a Charlize Theron (I won't complain about that).

Update on my weight loss: I lost 1.5 pounds in my first week of my weight loss challenge. Feeling very good.

Currently can't listen to much more than The Beatles and Depeche Mode. It's all good.

Let the Challenge Begin...

It all started in an innocent enough way. Dinner with a friend at a lovely little local latin (oooh, alliteration) restaurant, complete with twinkle lights and hippie servers. After much discussion about various topics personal and impersonal, it was time to put down my proposal. We've both been making note of our lack of weight loss and perhaps a pudge here and there (usually while sharing a dessert after dinner), so I thought now was the time to stop taking note and getting rid of the pudge.

My proposal was put out on the table around the time we got our banana ice cream drenched in chocolate ganache and caramel (yum!). There was an agreement...it was time. And, we had a motivation. We're going to be attending the KISS concert on December 1...a good date for the first weight loss goal. I mean, who doesn't want to look hot at a rock concert? Am I right? I am currently picturing myself in a size 8 pair of jeans.

We will be motivating and supportive along the way for one another (I'm sure), but the smack will come. I am certain the trash talk will emerge. And, why? Because there is pride and a prize on the line. The winner will have the loser (for lack of a better term) buy them a shirt or some kind of swag at the concert (hmmm, perhaps we will need a cap on spending....didn't think about that).

The challenge begins tomorrow...and I am determined to win. I want to win. I don't tend to be competitive, but I have my moments. This is something I want -- badly. Plus, I don't tend to enjoy being a failure in front of others, that in itself will be a motivator to me. On top of it, the person I am competing with is more than a friend, this person is a mentor. Who wants to look bad to their mentor? Not me.

I am going to beat this thing. I am going to win! So, send the positive weight loss vibes my way. I need to lose 12 pounds before December 1. KISS t-shirt (in a smaller size) here I come!

**Can you see me sticking my tongue out a la Gene Simmons?**

I'm Walking On Sunshine...

It has been a challenging week to say the least, but the clouds parted today and I am on cloud 9. It was one of those days where I started out feeling blue (even wore a bright color to cheer me up), but then things just turned around and by the end of the day I was grinning ear to ear. I owe a lot of the happiness to my friends, starting with my staffperson Jo who had me laughing when I got into the office this morning.

Then I met my good friend and mentor, Alan, for lunch and he proceeded to make me feel like I was on the right track with work...so nice to have people who understand and relate.

Back at the office, I had a wonderful conversation with a new employee and had my CEO tell me basically that I was awesome! Wahoo.

I rounded out my day with a committee meeting with some of my favorite people and then at home with my loving husband. Really, this day has just been full of positive energy and I feel blessed. Love days like this; I will cherish it.

Jasmine

Today was a tough one. A serious contrast to the wonderful, relaxing day I had yesterday. After rowing class, I came home to see Jasmine, my geriatric dog, lying on the floor with her legs sprawled in front of her; she was unable to lift herself. You could see the frustration in her large brown eyes. She was straining and whining, looking up at me and asking for help. It broke my heart.

Since she has come to live with us, she has had many medical problems. But, she has always been able to overcome them. She has been a fighter, a survivor. It is wonderful having her with us. It has given us some great experience of what it will be like to take care of a child. She has also been a fantastic companion --the times we have walked around the block, the mornings at the park or the Biltmore, and the days where she went out on errands with me.

Today was tough because I had the realization that my friend is not going to be with me much longer. We took her to the vet after seeing that her mobility has become very limited. It was tearing me up. I hate to see her like that considering how much of her faculties she still has. She still gets excited when she sees me. She still has a glitter in her eyes when I pull out her leash. And, she can still eat her dinner quicker than a Porsche can get to 100 MPH.

The vet had the talk with us, telling us it was time to begin thinking about when will be the right time to let her go. There is no right time if you ask me. I have had her since I was 18. She has been one of my best friends. She is part of our family and so very loved. I don't know if I will be able to let go of her, but I know the time will have to come. I will have to consider what is best for her and her quality of life.

For now, she is on pain medications and we are trying to ease the pain of the arthritis and muscle atrophy in her hips. We are lending her a hand when she eats or needs to go out in the yard to make things a little easier.

I know many people look at dogs or cats as just animals, but I didn't grow up that way. Our pets have always been part of the family. They have their own personalities and quarks. And, something you don't experience with other humans - a love, devotion and loyalty that is unfaltering. On a bad day, coming home to a wagging tale and wet kiss on the cheek can cheer you up. Or, the days when you're sick, the warmth of a soft fluffy cat curled up against you is soothing and therapeutic.

I feel blessed and fortunate to have grown up in a family that loves our pets.

Jasmine, I love you. You will always be that adorable puppy that could never resist kissing every person who came within feet of you.

Random Questions and Ponderings

I cannot put two ideas together in a linear fashion so I am just relying on random numbered questions and ponderings. Please read with an open mind.

1. Why, oh, why does that couple at dance have to hog the dance floor? There are at least 12 couples in the class and there is a huge dance floor for all of us to share, but the showy couple that also likes to goof off has to take over and impede on our space. Ugh! What to do about floor hogs?

2. Why is it one of the coolest things when you go to a restaurant and they greet you by name? We have become regulars at San Tan Brewery and it is nice to be recognized. Are just being needy? Or is it that we feel like we are reliving Cheers?

3. Why did Vans decide to sponsor an outdoor concert in Phoenix in the middle of the Summer? Today, I spent four hours out in the 105-degree summer heat at the Warped Tour. The music was great and I was so wanting to hang out longer to see the bands play, but goodness it was hot. I have not felt that horrible after a day in the sun. Bad time of year for something like this, but thousands of people still showed up.

4. Why is it so exciting to makeover one of the rooms in my house? I am going to tackle my bathroom this weekend and I am so excited about the prospect. I have paint, a new shelf, new shower curtain. My bathroom is going to look totally new and I am thrilled to bits. Wonderful Fourth of July project this weekend.

5. Why is Deadliest Catch so interesting? It is a show about a bunch of guys who fish for crab. Why do I feel so compelled to watch?

Music musings this month: U2, The Sundays, Westside Story, Belanova, Wilco and Depeche Mode.

Current read: In Defense of Food...trying to barrel through it so I don't have to renew my checkout of the book from the library.

My Thoughts on This Week

The death of an important doctor this last weekend has been weighing very heavily on my mind. First, it is just the image of a man ushering at church just as he would every Sunday and seeing a man come toward him with a gun. I can imagine the congregation hearing the shots fire and echo through the sanctuary. "What could that be?" Next, a sweating and anxious young man coming to get his wife in as quiet a way he can. The sound that echoes through the sanctuary next is the terrified and disbeliefing scream. Just thinking about this scene now brings tears to my eyes. Quite frankly hearing about the details of any human being killed is a frightening tale that aches my heart.

I know that this doctor was a controversial person in this country. I know that many people may see his name and think that he was also a murderer and that what he got was what he deserved. It is hard for me to believe that.

He stood by the side of frightened women who were carrying babies they wanted (hence carrying to a late term), but had to terminate the birth because of the risk to their own health. He cared for them and their families to ensure that not only was the woman's health taken into account, but that the family was able to cope with the pain of the loss - at a time when no one else would be there for them. Who can ever really cope with the loss of a child -- born or unborn? No one. It is a scar that a woman must always live with; a deep pain that may never heal. Nonetheless, some instances of health make it a necessity. But, politicians have stepped in where they don't belong. It is a woman's body; it is a decision she needs to only confide in her family and doctor to make.

Everyone's personal feelings on the matter of abortion are different -- personal. Personal. Where are we missing this? Just as religion is personal so are everyone's thoughts on health care. It may not be the choice I would make for myself, but I am not the one who dictates to others. I also don't condone war, but there are certainly a lot of them going on around the world. Our beliefs don't dictate to the environment; it doesn't work that way.

Sorry, I digress. What I choose for myself doesn't mean that I am better at making decisions for others. And, certainly what I believe doesn't mean that it should be so for others. Can I make the choice for a woman with an abusive husband, drug addiction and no home to live in? Can I make the decision for a family that already has five children and the main bread-winner in the household has lost his job? Can I make the decision for the woman who finds herself alone, pregnant and carrying a child with Downs Syndrome? I can't. I hope I never have to face the decision. It takes an amazing amount of courage and determination.

And, where does terrorism and striking fear into women who have to make this choice actually help? Where does it actually make a difference? Where does it make impact? It doesn't. It only creates fear. Not rationale. Not educated adults. Not women who feel they have worth.

The doctor's death was sad and unnecessary in and of itself. But, to hear the commentating on his death like it was God inflicting his wrath on an evil person is just so ignorant. I don't remember God giving us the right to judge others on this planet. When did that happen? This doctor was a respected man who fought for woman's rights to make their own decisions when it came to their reproductive health care. He continued to do what he believed was right and provide a service to women that thousands in the country refused to at the risk of his own life. Courage. Fighting for what he believed in. Standing up with women when politicians didn't think the voices of millions of women just weren't loud enough.

The point? This is bigger than just making my own decisions about the birth control pills I would like to take to keep from becoming pregnant until I am ready to have a family. This is about being a woman and being able to make my own decisions. Period. I have a voice, dammit. And, I don't want a politician to look at me and say, "Well, you are in your thirties, a career-minded woman and, oh, a blond. You can't make your own choices. Let me do it for you. Keep being the fragile, hopeless creature you have always been. It's for your own good."

No, thank you. Women have gotten much too far to just sit down and allow politicians to do this to us. To objectify us. Did the women before us fight in vain? I hope not. In a time when women are doing everything that men do...why aren't we given the same rights in every way that men are?

I pray for our country every day. I pray for people who are on both sides of this fence every day. I pray that God will truly come back into the picture again - a loving God where we embrace our fellow human beings and come up with solutions through dialogue together instead of yelling at one another. Instead of shooting one another.

I am sad today and will be for a long time. We are destroying the world and the people God has created just to get our way; just to impose our thoughts and beliefs on others. Is it worth it? Is the anger and dissidence worth it? Is the fear worth it?

I don't think it is.

What is? A woman who is smiling with the light of hope on her face because she has freedom, knowledge, and a future. Precisely what this doctor fought for.